http://anyotherwoman.com/2011/12/on-divorce/

That is all.

Well what do you know.

Managed to do something I've been meaning to do for ages and write the story of the divorce. Amazingly didn't make myself cry but it was harder to make it flow than I expected. And then I sent it to the lovely girls at http://www.anyotherwoman.com and they liked it. Er, who'd have thought it?

DND

...which stands for Decree Nisi Day.

Today.

Next stage of the divorce. First stage of the rest of my life.

It's funny how quickly not being Mrs C anymore feels natural and actually good. Not bad. Positive. Free.

Waking the dead.

Back home with my dad for the weekend and went to mum's grave this afternoon and had a little chat with her. Told her about my week, my new job, about M. I liked it that her grave was absolutely covered in flowers -not just ours :-)

I just so wish everything was different, even now.

Enough now.

Terrible day.

Spoke to M earlier for the first time in nearly 6 months, about what he wanted to do with the stuff that's still here (ie. in my house, which I will be selling soon in view new job). We were both coldly and icily polite to one another. It was horrible.

And I MISS MY MUM.

When a (wo)man is tired of London, (s)he is tired of life

Squeeeee. I'm doing it, I'm really doing it. I'm moving to London. New job starts in February!

I didn't think the interview went too well but to my utter amazement today I had a phonecall to offer me the job!!!!

Am very pleased, but when I put the phone down the first person I wanted to tell was Mum, and I hate it that I can't just pick up the phone and ring her any more. Dad told me she'd have been proud -I hope so.

Bah humbug.

I cried torrentially when I was driving yesterday because that stupid song 'All I want for Christmas is you' came on the radio and all I could think was 'all I want for Christmas is for my mum to be here with us'.