Friday 8 March 2013

The anti-mothers day post.

So I'm back from my travels (for now....more on that later) and am beyond shellshocked to be home. Thailand was so beautiful, Cambodia so tragically spectacular and Laos just blew. my. mind.

I may even share some photos at some point (I know, revolutionary!) but for now I have something else to say.

Mother's Day.

So it's 15 and a half months since I lost my beloved mum. My best friend, guide and supporter. The woman who cried when I got my (bad) A level results because she knew I had let myself down. The memory of those tears is what kept me going through a year of retakes, 5 years of medical school and years of postgraduate exams.

She's still the first person I want to tell everything to.

Mother's Day was never a big deal to us when she was alive. I always got her a card, and usually flowers, but we never did those big posh meals out or anything. She's not that kind of person and neither am I.

Now she's not here anymore, I suddenly find it really hard that I don't have anything to plan for Mother's Day. I can easily cry in the card aisle in Sainsburys because I no longer need to buy a pink flowery card (why are they always pink and flowery?) As my inbox fills with spam emails about buying your mum chocolates, jewellery or something from Amazon (yes, those are the kind of online retailers I buy from and hence end up on the mailing lists of- make of that what you will) I hit the 'delete' button with increasing fury.

What I'm really furious about isn't just that I don't have to waste £10 on a tacky card and wilting overpriced flowers. I'm furious because I don't like that retailers are capitalising on something that really, people should do anyway -ie. appreciating your loved ones. Want to buy your mum flowers in September? Do it. Want to take her out for dinner in November? Why not! Why should it just be one day of the year?

And that's the real nub of the issue. I'm angry, really, at myself. I'm angry that I didn't tell and show my mother more that I loved and appreciated her, when I had the chance. I hope she knows.

A quote from one of my favourite films 'Love, Actually', sums this up pretty much perfectly, even though it's actually said by Daniel about his recently-deceased wife:
'Tell her that you love her'....'I never told your mom enough. I should have told her everyday because she was perfect everyday'...

Happy Mother's Day to the mums out there. To those of you who have a mum, call her and tell her you love her. Don't wait til Sunday. Do it now.